Your voice expresses who you are at your core. It’s part of your self-talk — that steady stream of internal conversation that runs through your head, even when you’re not aware it’s happening. Knowing how to identify your inner voices and use positive self-talk can help women effectively cope with relationship problems, loss and anxiety.
Unfortunately, recognizing one’s own voice amidst a cacophony can be difficult. Old tapes from parents and other significant people throughout your life can play in your mind. Snippets of their remarks become so enmeshed with your self-talk that it’s hard to tell which are truly yours. Seeing a professional counselor who has specific experience in women’s issues can be very helpful in sorting one kind of thought from another.
Learning the difference between your voice and the internalized chatter of others is important. Your real voice represents your true feelings, wants and needs. It also reflects logical expectations and outcomes. Qualified counselors have several different methods to aid you in this process. Working as a team with a counselor, you’ll learn to tune into your self-talk and notice what it says about how you react to events or situations. This will help you identify unreasonable thinking and replace it with positive, reasonable thoughts.
Giving voice to feelings of loss, irrational anxiety, or the inability to achieve the type of relationship you have envisioned is the first step in healing. No matter what you are going through, your feelings are valid and deserve attention.
Learning new habits and methods of thinking can be challenging, but positive self-talk can make a night and day difference in your relationships and in how you face issues like loss and anxiety. As you strengthen your own thought processes and learn to counter the other, more negative thoughts that have formerly been prevailing, problems that formerly seemed insurmountable are put into perspective and become manageable.
Discovering your own voice, which is really reinforcing your self image, and using it to express your feelings and thoughts in positive ways will help you more effectively deal with just about every problem you must face. It can help you achieve greater personal integrity, and become the woman that, deep down, you have always wanted to be. The right professional counselor is an invaluable resource throughout this process.